5 Misconceptions About Porn and Pornstars
Mainstream Hollywood has certainly tried to portray what the porn industry is like. Movies like “Boogie Nights” come to mind. Most of those dramas about the business were set in the “golden age” of porn- the late 1970s and 1980s when the VHS tape revolutionized the industry. The reality is, porn, especially gay porn, isn’t like that in 2015. Yet all of us who are performers still get questions and hear the business that seem rather bizarre and dated to us.
Yes, I know you want to volunteer for the job. The bad news is, there are no fluffers in gay porn. If someone is having “trouble,” you have your co-star, or your iPad with some “selected content” to arouse you.
In Hollywood’s depiction of porn, lots of performers are using lots of drugs. In reality, drugs pretty much ruin your performance as a man. In more than fourteen shoots, I have yet to encounter even one performer who was high or even buzzed while doing a scene. Those of us who consider ourselves “professional” want our cocks to be rock hard, and to be in control of our bodies to flex and look best for the camera.
3. Production crew sex
Contrary to what most viewers think, the production crew- cameras, producers, directors, lighting guys- does not suddenly drop what their doing and start having sex with the performers. They have a job to do. We have a job to do. Do they get aroused while shooting us? Sometimes I suspect they do. Most of the time, however, they’ve seen enough fucking and sucking over the years, that we might as well be food they’re photographing. They’re professionals and they’re doing what they’re paid to do. Add to that, many companies, including TitanMen, have specific rules prohibiting the crew from touching the talent. Aside: I wouldn’t mind doing a scene with ANY of our crew members at TitanMen. All of them are attractive guys that I would fuck in a heartbeat.
4. Post scene sex
If you’ve been working at the ice cream shop all day serving all kinds of ice cream, as well as sampling the ice cream, the last night you want when you get home, is have more ice cream. Shooting porn is hard work! Yeah that’s a pun, but it’s also true. You are flexing and posing muscles for hours. You are in challenging positions. You are physically exerting yourself by fucking, top or bottom, for hours at a time. And when it’s time to cum, you’ve got the mental pressure of 6-10 people all waiting on you to shoot a load. When that scene is over, (usually about six hours total) you’re wiped out. For the most part, you’re ready for a big meal (since you’ve eaten very little to look as lean as possible), and you want to sleep for about four hours. More sex is the last thing on your mind.
With that said, off-camera sex does sometimes happen between performers on the days they’re not doing a scene. If you’re in town for five days for two scenes and you have one day between where you’re not shooting, that’s when it’s most likely to happen. It’s still rare though. When you have sex for hours on-camera, finding more sex off-camera on a day off, isn’t nearly as pressing as it is for the average horny guy. I have, however, met guys who are on Grindr or Scruff hours after a scene looking for a hook-up that night or the next day.
5. You develop relationships with your co-stars
Friendships maybe. Relationships few. There aren’t many successful pornstar couples- Jesse Jackman and Dirk Caber are a rarity. Most of the time, we meet a few hours or maybe one day before a scene. Hopefully we talk, try to get to know each other, and develop some kind of cursory friendship. Sadly, not all performers are willing to invest in even that, despite the fact, it makes the scene so much better. Much like an actor in a real Hollywood movie, I want to BE my scene partner’s lover/fuck buddy/husband for that day. My goal is to get into their head and make it as real for them and for me as humanly possible. I generally won’t even text my real partner on the day of a scene because I want my all-consuming focus to be on my screen partner that day. It’s frustrating when other talent isn’t willing to try and make that kind of investment, but few seem to realize what a difference that makes.
For the most part, when a scene is over, all of us board planes and fly to our respective homes all over the country. Sometimes you build meaningful friends like the one I have with Jesse and Dirk. But most of the time, you don’t hear much from your screen partner once it’s over. I think we as performers can and should do better than that. It’s a tough business and all of us need the support of knowing we’re in it together.